Eye of the Tiger

For you "older" readers (haha) you know how the song and how it motivates you... That is where I am.. I'm not kidding, I let myself get physically sick and emotionally drained last week anticipating our Dr. appt. It's crazy... it took the weekend to rebuild myself.. I'm so over it!!! After speaking with other cancer peeps.. I find that that is totally normal.. but it's not my style. So I'm telling you guys now.. in the next few days.. I'm gonna let you know when my appt. is and be ready to keep me UP and remind me how stupid I was this time.. or better yet.. remind me to read this posting.. so I'm off to get the day going.. with my theme song for the day.. da da... da ta da.. da ta da da da.. (Eye of the Tiger) Love you all. and hope you are smiling from my crazy post. Debbie

3 More Months!!

Yea.. Dr. says I'm doing great.. CT Scan shows "stable" they say that's the labs terms.. but that is good. He tells me that we will continue the 3 month visits for another year.. typically the cancer can come back in the first 1-2 years.. I'm almost at my year anniversary... we left the appointment in good spirits today but emotionally drained.. should sleep good tonight.. hope to.. Again I thank you all for the prayers and extra prayers. I'm blessed to have you in my life. If ever any of you need a prayer.. let me know.. Love you all.. Debbie

Over the water works

Hi there.. so this morning I seem to be doing better.. not crying "over spilled milk" haha. Thank you ladies for your post yesterday.. you help lift my spirits. Better today, eyes a little puffy.. from yesterday and lack of sleep. Looking forward to being over the worrying.. I do this every time, then after the good news (praying) I hit the floor running again. Funny, I find myself feeling guilty that during my 3 months I get comfortable with life and sometimes don't get those things that are important to me done. Maybe this is god's way of reminding me. (he knows I'm special and need to be hit over the head every once in a while ... every 3 months is good...) today i'm going about my day.. tired but thankful for my gifts today. Thanks for being here. Debbie

Things you leave behind

Good Morning.. Thankful to be here today.. however, it's one of those days that feels like a pms day .. although I know that isn't it. it's those days where you could cry about anything.. hair won't do right, can't find my phone, the light turned red, straw won't go into my coke lid right.. you know. I'm certain it's this Dr. appt. coming up. So an explanation of the title for today.. I went to put some things in our lock box in the bank... and right when I was getting ready to close it up.. something told me to leave a little I Love You note in it for Curt. So I did. Then I get in my car and lose it.. you know the stories and country songs about getting something after that person has passed on.. guess that is what came to mind. Or it was a reminder to continue everyday to show your love and affection never knowing what the future holds. and maybe all this happened for me to share with you today to encourage you to do the same. I had to stop by and get a hug from Curt before I carried on with my day.. I'm just feeling the pressure of Thursday a little and had to release this morning. Thank you all for your prayers and being here for me. Love and blessings to you all. I'm not just saying it... I mean it. I love you. Debbie

2 am

Good Morning.. Well, it's 2 am and I'm here at my desk trying to get it organized.. can't sleep.. I'm sure it's because of the big week ahead. Don't feel nervous about seeing the doctor... but I'm betting 10 to 1 that's why I'm sitting here right now. I'm feeling good. Have been very busy with the girls over the past two weeks.. First Cheyenne was on vacation then she returned to school and Cassie came down for her spring break and went back home on Sunday. We had a lot of fun.. My brain is in overdrive now and my body doesn't feel like it's keeping up.. I'm admitting that I have to many irons in the fire and need to take a day to sort it all out.. admitting that is huge for me.. :-) So I'm taking a deep breath right now.. got a chance to talk it out with you guys and I'm gonna try to go to bed. Help a sista out this week and say a little prayer for me and the family. Love Debbie

CT Scan today

Well.. I'm here drinking my "stuff" for one hour so I can get my scan.. today is just the scan.. dr. appt. next week. still fighting this head cold a little.. I feel a little beat today.. could be cuz I'm a breakfast person and I didn't get to eat breakfast.. You can bet I'll be running out this door when I'm done to get me some lunch.. so say a little prayer for me.. I'll keep you posted. Love Debbie

Under the weather and back up again

Hey all.. sorry to leave you hanging.. I had the worst sinus infection that started over the weekend and by Monday my head felt like a bowling ball on my shoulders.. I was the first one at the clinic.. basically there when the lights came on.. lol.. got my antibotics and started them immediately.. doing much better now. not to mention my glands started to swell on my left side.. kinda scared me a bit.. because until now i haven't really been sick and I worried about my immune system going low... and those neck glands.. doctor didn't seem to be worried.. and all it better.. this week my step daughter Cassie is here visiting us for her spring break.. Chey is back in school.. we are trying to fill our time with fun stuff .. little harder for a teen (almost 16) than with Chey. But today we are going for a massage.. "bonus" for me.. :-) looking forward to it.. hope all is well with everyone. Thur. is my CT scan.. and next week my Dr. appt. doing ok with it at the time.. Love Debbie

God at work

Good morning. As most of you know, our horse died on Christmas day last year. The only words that made it better for Cheyenne was that it was Jesus' birthday and he wanted a beautiful white horse to ride. Not to mention TK had been with us for 28 years. As the months have gone by we had mentioned to friends that we were looking for something for Chey. of course, she wanted a paint horse. I told her the looks weren't as important as gentle. So I got a phone call about a gentle horse and it just so happened to be a paint horse named Lacy. Now I know you mothers know what I'm talking about when your heart swells up, your eyes fill with tears when you see your child so happy an overjoyed. That was me. heck... that's still me while I'm writing this. These moments are so special and precious.. I can't tell you how many times she told me she loved me that day.. How I know everyday is a gift and I'm so thankful, but some days get a little extra cherry on top. :-) God bless you all. Debbie

makin up for yesterday

Hey there.. WOW I had 5 messages from my last blog posting.. I was so excited to see responses.. Now, I don't expect it from you guys... you know that.. and a lot of you have told me why you don't respond.. prefectly fine.. for those of you who can.. for whatever reason you may come here to read.. I sometimes find myself looking for the same.. So making up for yesterday.. I don't know if it's hormones or stress that has me going from 0 to "crazy" in 5 seconds.. just little things can set me off.. course Curt had a good idea that it was the full moon. I'm doing much better today.. until something happens.. haha. Got something in the works today.. should all go well, i'll be sharing a sweet and happy story for me and the family.. God sure does work in mysterious ways.. Cherish your day today rain or sun. Love Debbie

Staying strong

Gotta tell ya.. the weekend started out a little tough.. to the point of getting upset and shedding a few tears.. then I beat myself up wondering if letting myself worry is a sign of weakness or that I'm not putting my worries in God's hands.. The weekend did get better keeping busy and visiting with friends.. just sharing and talking a little about it was helpful and it didn't seem to make others uncomfortable. Curt was really sweet to me to in my time of need.. very nurturing.. I love it when he wraps his big arms around me.. today I'm doing pretty good.. cranking out a to do list.. hope all is well with you. Julie.. I never see your words as bla bla.. I look forward to your words of comfort and smile on your comments.. keep them coming. Love you all. Deb

It's Friday..

Good Friday to you.. I've been a little busy and a little crazy the past few days.. sorry I missed ya. You already know what's on my mind.. Funny thing.. the first think I woke up wondering about this morning is the difference between the CT scans that I get.. a couple of times I've had the barium stuff. yuk.. most of the time I take this oil/water stuff.. wonder what the difference.. what it showes vs. the other... then I know an MRI shows pretty much everything.. wondering if I'll get another one of those in the future.. and then.. if that didn't have my mind going enough.. I started thinking about how claustrophobic I get in the MRI.. this was all this morning before I got out of bed.. I'm like ... what tha.. so it's obvious that I'm a little worried.. I'm ok.. this is just how I wake up and sometimes how I go to bed.. wheels turning.. just thought I share.. We are hitting a mud bog on Sat. and hopefully doing a little work in the yard AS A FAMILY (been hitting and missing out on that..) Chey's spring break is next week.. I'll be busy trying to keep her busy.. haha.. so this is my brain on a Friday.. I miss hearing from ya'll. Can you believe we are almost in a YEAR from when this whole cancer started.. counting my blessings for that. Have a wonderful weekend.

Keepin it in the family

Hello.. sorry I missed ya yesterday.. spend the day with my sister.. she recently had a strange looking mole removed.. came back cancerous.. so went to the doctor with her yesterday for a follow up.. seems that everything is ok.. will be removing a little more from that area to make sure. I went along for support and to ask questions.. seeing how I think I'm a "C" expert and all.. HA! I had told her to get it looked at a long time ago.. glad she finally got around to it.. they will follow her every 3 months for a year.. please, please if you have anything like that on you.. get it checked out.. scary yes.. but nothing more worse than regret that you should have, could have done it earlier and let it go for to long.. you owe it to yourself and your family.. Lori love's to be tan and used tanning beds a lot a few years ago.. let me tell you something.. WHITE is beautiful.. now if your ashy... apply lotion.. :-) play it safe my friends.. that's my life's lesson for the day.. love Debbie.

Mellow Monday.

Good morning.. I find myself staring at the keyboard this morning wondering what to type.. I'm in between feelings right now and kinda waiting to see how my day is going to end up. This weekend was nice.. no specific place to be at any certain time.. we spent time together.. snuggled a little on the couch and had time to have a little good conversation.. Curt's going out of town today for work.. probably has a little bit to do with my "mellow Monday" and of course it is the first of MARCH.. my follow up month. Gotta keep my focus on other things than what my body and mind may be telling.. makes me a little nervous. I know it's only going to get worse.. so say yer prayers for me.. :-) My CT scan will be on the 19th and my Dr. appt. is on the 26th.. spring break for Chey will be next week.. so maybe I can find some fun things to do to keep us entertained that week.. I'll check back in with ya'll tomorrow. Have a good day. Love Deb